As I tossed and turned in my sleep last night, my mind drifted through a long gallery of the friends I’ve known throughout my life. There were boyhood friends from the streets of Memphis; high school companions in Little Rock; the brothers-in-arms from college and law school in Fayetteville; and the colleagues who became kin in Little Rock, Washington, D.C., and now here in Charlotte. Beyond those anchors, there are the “random” friends scattered across the map, from the rocky coasts of Maine to the cliffs of Santa Barbara. I am a fortunate man; if I were to write a letter to each, the task would likely consume a year, yet each occupies a sacred, permanent space in my heart.
While I find much to dislike about the landscape of social media, I am grateful for the way it allows me to keep a distant, watch over these friends, both new and old. It may provide only a fractured reflection of reality, but it is an improvement over the silence of the pre-Facebook era. Through that digital window, I witness the quiet rhythms of their lives—the birthdays still being celebrated, the long-awaited trips to Europe, and the simple joys found in children and grandchildren.
As we move through the season of Lent, we often become so consumed by the strictly “spiritual” that we risk neglecting the “here and now.” I suspect that God might occasionally tell us to spend a little more time engaging with the reality of our neighbors and perhaps a little less time staring at the heavens. One Lenten discipline I have encountered—though never quite mastered—is the act of reaching out to a lost or seldom-contacted friend. It includes the practice of forgiving a long-forgotten misstep or bridging an old silence to renew a bond of the past. I am inclined to add this practice to my already long list this year.
Human friendship is one of the greatest gifts God bestows on us. It is more than a social convenience; it is a glimpse into the nature of the Creator. When we choose to love, to forgive, and to remain present in the lives of others, we are participating in the divine. True friendship is an echo of the selfless love that brought us into being—a holy spark that reminds us we were never meant to walk this earth alone. In the faces of those we have known and loved, we see the most tangible evidence of a God who deeply desires for us to be connected, known, and cherished.
Forgiveness is why I reach out to you in 2017 to come to Hubbell Society, Museum and Library 17th reunion. That started our friendship. Interesting thing about forgiveness, it frees both the one who is forgiven and the one who forgives.
I have always been grateful.