Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like “struggle.” — Fred Rogers.
Fred Rogers’ simple definition immediately shifts love from a passive, effortless feeling to a continuous, deliberate labor.
Love manifests in countless forms—maternal bonds, fraternal commitment, the deep loyalty of friendship, and the fire of a first romance. Yet, in every manifestation, love requires sustainment. The “struggle” is not a fight against the loved one, but the necessary work of acceptance, forgiveness, and patience required to maintain connection through inevitable growth, change, and pain. Even the concept of unconditional love, whether human or divine, requires intentional effort to be fully given and received. Who among us has not struggled with the limits of their own capacity to extend grace or accept vulnerability?
The loves of our lives, especially first loves, often leave indelible marks—not just the joy, but the lessons learned from the struggle of what blew it apart. As we mature, we gain the perspective to appreciate every bond we’ve ever held. We realize that the value of those relationships lies precisely in the effort we invested. Each person who touched our heart holds a special place in our hearts, honored by the energy and attention we dedicated.
Mister Rogers reminds us that while caring can be easy, sustained love is not. To continue showing up for someone as they grow, change, and sometimes disappoint or cause pain, requires profound, active commitment. But the effort is the reward. When it comes to love, putting in the work is always worth the struggle.
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