Letters to Tom — Default

Dear Tom:

I have been frustrated recently by what I call medicine by default. I won’t go into the boring details, but I simply felt that certain decisions about my treatment were made simply by not making a decision than by a conscious thought process. My frustration didn’t make anything better as well, and I continued to obsess. Fortunately, the more I thought about “default medicine,” the more I had to admit that way too often I had engaged “default deciding” myself. As my mother would say, “I was getting a come up ance.”

How often do we make decisions by not deciding? More often than we care to admit, I expect. On small things, it happens all the time. We can’t decide between the red or blue shirt, so we buy neither. We can’t decide between drinks with friends or a movie by yourself, and you end up staying home. Many non-decisions are harmless. Many non-decisions can be disastrous. We continue in a destructive relationship because we don’t know the best way to get out of it. We continue to work in a toxic environment, because we are afraid of change. We all can look back and remember where our default decisions were major decisions in our life.

All this thinking about “default medicine” causes me to think about how much of my spirituality and relationship with God is by default? Have I approached this most important relationship simply by letting inertia control or is it a result of conscious process involving both my mind and heart. I know that God has not been an “absentee owner” in my life. Why should my relationship with God be structured by default? I have to remind myself that my spiritual life should be decided by a well thought out, love-based process. God and I both deserve the attention.

Your friend, Webb

About the author

Webb Hubbell is the former Associate Attorney General of The United States. His novels, When Men Betray, Ginger Snaps, A Game of Inches, The Eighteenth Green, and The East End are published by Beaufort Books and are available online or at your local bookstore. When Men Betray won one of the IndieFab awards for best novel in 2014. Ginger Snaps and The Eighteenth Green won the IPPY Awards Gold Medal for best suspense/thriller. His latest, “Light of Day” will be on the bookstands soon.

1 Comment +

  1. “Default” and “Going Through the Motions” seem to me very related. Since our heart attacks, I have struggled to meet each day, and my energy has been much less than, as Chuck Yeager so eloquently stated it, “Balls to the wall!”. The focus is just not there, and I can no longer command the DI in me to take command. I suck it up when I “have” to, but most days I just go through the motions. I seek God’s guidance, but either I am deaf (despite my new hearing aids) or I am not on a frequency that is in tune with God. I am thankful but very tired – here in Frederick, MD.
    Thanks, my dear friend, for your letters. Thanks also for our friendship.
    In Christ,

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